Observations from the Highway

Headquarters of Aubuchon Hardware sits on Rte. 2 as I head to work [and of course it continues to sit there after I have raced by]. Rte. 2 is called the Mohawk Trail, but there's nothing special or Mohawkey about it that I can see. It's a four-lane limited access highway like any other. One sight worth seeing used to be the enormous American flag that flew outside Aubuchon. It must have been the largest size made and had to have weighed a ton when wet. Not that anyone probably knew, because they never took it down. It was there in the rain, in the dark, at all times. I wonder if rules used to be different. I remember in the Girl Scouts we weren't supposed to fly the flag in the rain.


Anyway, dear reader, it's gone now. I noticed the other day as I practiced my disciplinarian speech for class ("please be quiet"), that it had been replaced by a much smaller, no longer outsized flag. Bummer.

Also on Rte. 2 and it's still there, is the yellow traffic sign that says only:
FAMOUS DUCKS
I have asked my students about this and no one knows. Does Donald live there, I asked? Daffy?

I do enjoy seeing the sign and one day I await the crossing of a Really Famous Duck.

Moving to Rte. 290 in Worcester, the well-loved polar bear seems to be missing from the Polar Soda billboard.

What's up with that? Generations of children grew up enjoying that bear. It wasn't a picture. It was a three-dimensional white figure that swayed somewhat in the wind. In recent years I have thought that the bear was downsized and now it's gone. Maybe it's in for maintenance.


One fun thing to see from Rte. 290 can only be witnessed one day a year. It's the sight of several hundred blue-robed grads standing on the steps of Auburn High for their class picture. It's an inspiring sight full of hope, though you are going at least 60 mph when it comes into view and can only catch the quickest of glances. One or two of those happy alumni usually end up in my class across 290.

Art bloopers: "The artist used several layers of vanish to achieve this effect."
"This is never seen again in the works of Leonardo DaVinci or anywhere in his cannon."

A bientot
love,
becky

If I Could Be in a Painting

I wouldn't mind spending an evening with this woman.


She's purposeful. She's on a mission. Something is going on and I'd like to be in on her plan. I'm sure I could help. My natural nosiness would be an asset to her and she could send me around to the other side of the event to scrutinize from there. There's no way she's watching the opera below and besides that, the man across the way is watching HER. Oh, this is intrigue I can't pass up. Put me in. Woman In Black at the Opera by Mary Cassatt (one of my true faves anyway)

Or if I were feeling rather more informal, I wouldn't mind being inserted into this scene by John Singer Sargent.
This group looks as though they've been dipping into the port or the absinthe or the laudanum.
HEY!!! THROCKMORTON!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID WITH THE HORSE?
WHAT?
I SAID DO YOU KNOW WHERE THE HORSE IS?
THAT CLOUD RIGHT THERE BY THE TREE? IT LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE MY UNCLE JOE! IT'S SCARING ME, MAN!

On second thought, maybe I'd rather work on my dance skills.
I love this Edgar Degas ballerina. She is at the outside leaning apex of a triumphant bow, I feel, a nanosecond away from collapsing forward and receiving Bravas from the audience. She has given her all. It's thrilling.
But I might also like to be just on my way home from a night of doing something secret.

Sargent again and I will stop here. The girl and I have things to chat about this chilly morning. I am falling in step with her now--you can't see me but I am there. Those men across the way should mind their own business.

A bientot
love,
becky

Bloopers for Man in the Box - It's My Birthday!

Enjoy!

Bloopers for Man in the Box - It's My Birthday!

Enjoy!

Something On Your Mind?

Anyone who has ever had a person on the brain, as it were, can relate to this Marc Chagall painting. It's called BIRTHDAY, but I love it for the magical attention paid, the "bending over backwards" quality of the man.

And who wouldn't like to be carried off?

Back to school this week, dear reader. And guess what, art analysis papers coming in. No one selected Chagall this time, drat the luck.

My friend Chris and I sometimes say to each other, "I don't know anything good."

Consider that statement reiterated.

CURRENT HOMEOWNING COMPLAINTS

1)Mysterious leak in water line coming into house. Banging noise coming up from basement whenever water is requested from pipes. Showers abbreviated.

2) Mysterious short circuit in telephone line coming into house. Intermittent problem not showing itself currently, so don't care as much.

3) Mysterious migrating toilet. Brand new appliance moves around on its own. It might be planning to leave for South America.

Remember, dear reader: "It's much nosier at a restaurant than eating at home."

Sometimes the waitstaff asks too many questions, know what I'm saying?

Like who's that man flying behind you?

Be here now.

Be in a painting if you can.

A bientot

love,

becky

Things I won't be Eating on Easter

I definitely won't be eating anything like this. Tender little creamy morsels oozing with liqueur and other succulent flavors. Okay, okay, I won't describe anything. We'll just pretend.

And I most assuredly won't be eating this.


I could have those berries, though. I could politely rip off the green stems and enjoy the tartness of berries. No black coffee, either. One cup of that and you can call me Bette Davis in Whatever Happened to Baby Jane, bug-eyed and jangled in the middle of the night.

That is some bad-looking lipstick, I might add. I'd have plenty of time to apply it while I couldn't sleep. Okay, back to our originally scheduled program.

Oh dear god, I'm making the sign of the cross now to protect myself from this one.



Best not to speak of it.

Here are some things I CAN have.



YUM.


And DOUBLE YUM. This is a turnip and not a primitive potter's bowl as one might think.

MAXIFIED YUM:

And speaking of Brussells sprouts, here are some workers in the UK sorting the little buggers. Don't they look fulfilled and happy? The workers, I mean, not the sprouts.


I want a job where I can wear Playtex Living Gloves to work.

In truth, when you think about it, there's no reason why I can't do that now.

Weekend blooper: "Our ship was crude by the porters specifically assigned to that cruise."
I'll just bet it was.

I hope you have an enjoyable day, dear reader. My wishes for you do not exclude any pleasures.


A bientot
love,
becky

Red Sox Champions Carry Their Own Bags

No!!! It can't be!!! And yet there is Manny Ramirez doing it. Pulling it ALL BY HIMSELF.



This is Hideki Okajima -- Okie as he is known on the Red Sox-- CARRYING HIS OWN BAG.
Okay, well, Okie is not a HUGE star so maybe we're not totally surprised. Look how small that bag is. Hope he has enough underwear in there.

Looking very Donald Sutherlandesque, Curt Schilling carries HIS own bag and wears BEIGE of all things. What was he thinking? Plenty of underwear and a pillow for beauty sleep.



Tim Wakefield is happy because the knuckleball is known to swerve around an extra revolution in Japan. A little bit of sushi between the cheek and gum, my friends.

Jason Varitek is manly in any country, and I know he would change my tire on the highway. Do they drive on the wrong side?


This is a very satisfying photograph (all are from the Boston Globe--YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST). Always in Boston, Dice K hangs back, looks shy, seems out of place. BUT NOT IN TOKYO, BABY! Can't you just picture him coming alive? HEY, COME ON, YOU GUYS, I GOT THREE MORE DIVE BARS TO TAKE YOU TO BEFORE THE NIGHT IS OVER. I'M KING OF THE DART TEAM AT TWO OF THEM!



Just look at that smile!!! I'm thinking no-hitter for the opening.
Josh ain't here anyway.

A bientot and thanks again to the Boston Globe.
love from Red Sox Nation,
becky

Dear?

G: Honey?

T: Yes?

G: I'm so happy you are wearing a regular hat.

T: Yeah, me too.

G: The bag was foolish.

T: Yeah, well....

G: You call much more attention to yourself with a bag over your head than merely looking normal.

T: Hey baby?

G: Besides, no one has ever heard of Hannaford's grocery store, whatever it is.

T: Hey, baby?

G: Yes, love?

T: Have you ever heard of the Buffalo Bills?

G: I suppose that is more American sports. You know I am not into that.

T: Yes, but have you ever heard of them?

G: I think so. They are eaten with blue cheese dressing, isn't that right?

T: Very funny. Tim Russert is a big fan of the Bills.

G: Are you taking me for dinner?

T: Yes. The Buffalo Bills went to four Super Bowls.


G: I am really in the mood for Thai.

T: You're not listening, Giselle. The Bills lost four Super Bowls in a row. Did you hear me? In a row.

G: That is terrible. Did they wear bags over their heads?

T: Don't you think that's a lot worse than losing one Super Bowl?

G: Certainly, darling. I am going to splurge and eat half of an egg roll. I promise. Is that your cell?

T: Oh man? When is Eli going to stop prank calling me?

G: Doesn't he know that's really childish?

T: Yeah, Peyton does it too sometimes. But wait. It's not Eli.

G: Oh darling, take a deep breath. Things can't be any worse.

G: It's Bridget.


Things can always be worse, dear reader.
I'm enjoying spring break. In the words of one of my students I am grinning "from ear to ear to ear."
A bientot

love,
becky

Behind the Scenes of An Honest R&B Song

"Ooh, Girl!" - An Honest R&B Song is blowing up. The raw sexuality Mike Polk displays in the video rivals that of Horace Brown's 1994 "Taste Your Love"... Except that Mike openly admits he's bad at sex. Here are some pics from that shoot.

Mike sings to camera as his lady friend sits back on the bed, unsatisfied. All too familiar.

The house we shot in was huge, providing all sorts of places for Mike and his girlfriend to have awkward, elbow-y sex.

Matt and Brian were on set to help with the shoot, as always.

Mike taking a time out to test the waters. Is it me or does he look six years old here to anybody else?

Mike looking especially pale.

Matt is either shedding some light on our actors, or is about to do some serious kickboarding action.

Smooth.

Jaime helped direct and produce the video. She jumped in to get a pic with the big, black, beautiful... Escalade.

Matching Adidas track suits are all the rage on the L.A player scene these days, FYI.

Fucking epic. This is an album cover if I ever saw one.

Leave comments and feel free to describe your most embarrassing sexual encounter! Don't all go at once, we might flood the boards with this one.

Behind the Scenes of An Honest R&B Song

"Ooh, Girl!" - An Honest R&B Song is blowing up. The raw sexuality Mike Polk displays in the video rivals that of Horace Brown's 1994 "Taste Your Love"... Except that Mike openly admits he's bad at sex. Here are some pics from that shoot.

Mike sings to camera as his lady friend sits back on the bed, unsatisfied. All too familiar.

The house we shot in was huge, providing all sorts of places for Mike and his girlfriend to have awkward, elbow-y sex.

Matt and Brian were on set to help with the shoot, as always.

Mike taking a time out to test the waters. Is it me or does he look six years old here to anybody else?

Mike looking especially pale.

Matt is either shedding some light on our actors, or is about to do some serious kickboarding action.

Smooth.

Jaime helped direct and produce the video. She jumped in to get a pic with the big, black, beautiful... Escalade.

Matching Adidas track suits are all the rage on the L.A player scene these days, FYI.

Fucking epic. This is an album cover if I ever saw one.

Leave comments and feel free to describe your most embarrassing sexual encounter! Don't all go at once, we might flood the boards with this one.